Alice - Season 7
1 - Sorry, Wrong Lips
Air Date: October 6, 1982
Debbie Reynolds plays an actress whose torrid memoirs convince Mel he's the one she remembers as the greatest kisser in her life.
2 - Do You Take . . . ?
Air Date: October 13, 1982
Mel tries to outdo an old buddy who shows up boasting a track record of fast living and sporting a blonde on his arm as proof.
3 - The Secret of Mel's Diner
Air Date: October 20, 1982
There's gold in them there walls, or so Mel reckons after learning that the eccentric who built his diner left $20,000 stashed in another building.
4 - Alice at the Palace
Air Date: October 27, 1982
Joel Grey offers his services gratis as the leading man in a musical revue bankrolled by Mel and featuring Alice. Mel, however, has never heard of Grey and gives the role to his bookie.
5 - Joel Grey Saves the Day
Air Date: November 3, 1982
Joel Grey walks out after producer Mel turns a revue about New York into a desert musical with tunes like ""Two Tootsies from Tucson"" and ""Ramona from Arizona.""
6 - Alice's Turkey of a Thanksgiving
Air Date: November 10, 1982
Alice's meddlesome mother knocks the stuffing out of her daughter's Thanksgiving dinner.
7 - Carrie on the Rebound
Air Date: January 9, 1983
Carrie is slow to come out of a depression after a quickie divorce.
8 - Jolene's Brother Jonas
Air Date: January 16, 1983
Jolene's brother pays a surprise visit, but the surprise is on him, he gets an icy reception from his sister.
9 - Alice Sees the Light
Air Date: February 28, 1983
Everyone takes with a grain of salt Alice's claim that she saw a UFO.
10 - Vera the Virtuoso
Air Date: March 7, 1983
Vera, whose cello playing can reduce a virtuoso to tears, is asked to play in a local string quartet.
11 - Alice Faces the Music
Air Date: March 14, 1983
The waitresses pit their musical knowledge against that of three plumbers on a TV quiz show.
12 - Tommy, the Jailbird
Air Date: March 21, 1983
Alice fears that freshman Tommy is abusing his new freedom away from home by majoring in extracurricular activities.
13 - Jolene and the Night Watchman
Air Date: March 28, 1983
Jolene can't bring herself to bruise the tender feelings of a bruiser who saved her life and now considers her his girl.
14 - Mel's Dream Car
Air Date: April 11, 1983
Mel is stripping his gears over his jazzy new Porsche he purchased for a measly $20.
15 - Come Back Little Sharples
Air Date: April 17, 1983
Mel has had it up to his keister with the way things are going so he absconds to his apartment for a beer and pizza binge.
16 - Vera, the Torch
Air Date: April 24, 1983
Vera wishes her landlady the worst for evicting her pets then feels responsible when the old crank's apartment catches on fire.
17 - The Grass is Always Greener
Air Date: May 1, 1983
In role reversals, Mel becomes an employee by accepting an executive position with a catering firm, and the waitresses become owners by buying his diner.
18 - Tommy Fouls Out
Air Date: May 15, 1983
Afraid that he's lost the ""right stuff,"" Tommy quits the basketball team.
19 - Vera on the Lam
Air Date: May 22, 1983
After Mel decides to have the waitresses bonded, Vera owns up to a criminal past and takes it on the lam.
20 - Mel's Cousin Wendy?
Air Date: May 29, 1983
To steal a competitor's secret sauce recipe, Mel persuades his cousin to pose as a woman and apply for a job as a Burger Baby.
21 - Sweet Erasable Mel
Air Date: June 5, 1983
Mel's experiment with a computer goes well until Vera enters a transaction and erases every trace of Mel's financial existance.
22 - Tommy Hyatt, Business Consultant
Air Date: June 12, 1983
Using Tommy's marketing advice, Mel increases his business but also learns he's heading for bankruptcy.
23 - Jolene Lets the Cat Out of the Bag
Air Date: September 18, 1983
Jolene's hair is standing on end with a cat burglar prowling her neighborhood.