Better Off Ted

1 - Pilot

Air Date: March 18, 2009

Ted Crisp works at Veridian Technologies in the research and development department and loves his job. However, Ted is taken aback when he learns the company has cryogenically frozen one of the scientists in his department.

2 - Heroes

Air Date: March 25, 2009

Due to Phil's after effects from the cryogenic experiment, Ted tries to get him to sign a waiver to protect Veridian from possible future litigation. Elsewhere, Phil and Lem try to create beef despite having no meat in the lab.

3 - Through Rose Colored HAZMAT Suits

Air Date: April 1, 2009

When Ted's nanny calls in sick, he is forced to take his daughter Rose to work where Veronica bonds with her. Meanwhile, Ted learns where he stands with Linda when her ex-boyfriend arrives in town.

4 - Racial Sensitivity

Air Date: April 8, 2009

Ted discovers Veridian has a problem when their new motion detection system proves unable to recognize black people.

5 - Win Some, Dose Some

Air Date: April 15, 2009

Linda is given an experimental drug that has some unusual side effects.

6 - Goodbye, Mr. Chips

Air Date: April 22, 2009

Ted inadvertently deletes himself from Veridian's system when he tries to fix his employee ID, and, as the lab falls into chaos, his peers try to remedy the situation.

7 - Get Happy

Air Date: May 5, 2009

After a survey reveals that the staff is unhappy, Veronica tries to improve their morale.

8 - You Are the Boss of Me

Air Date: June 23, 2009

Lem and Phil reluctantly invite Ted to their Medieval Fight Club. Linda tries to befriend Veronica.

9 - Bioshuffle

Air Date: June 30, 2009

When Veronica, Linda, and Ted end up having to share offices, tensions grow between them.

10 - Trust and Consequences

Air Date: July 14, 2009

Veridian blames Linda for a perfume with unexpected side effects, and friends fall out when they're forced to testify.

11 - Father, Can You Hair Me?

Air Date: July 21, 2009

A shocking piece of news impacts the rivalry between Veronica and her father, who is the CEO of another big company. Elsewhere, Ted thinks Phil and Lem's potential cure for baldness will impress his hard-to-please dad.

12 - Jabberwocky

Air Date: August 11, 2009

Ted creates a phony project for Linda after she hears that Veridian is going green, which becomes problematic when other staffers want to join the cause.

13 - Secrets and Lives